The Great Garlic Monday, September
10, 2007
Big discovery: a math that is far superior to Calculus for methods in physics, chemistry, and general everyday life have been uncovered and compiled by me. I have named this math Hirmonoculos. “Why?” you may ask. Well, it is truly because I wanted to hear something really Greek at that time, and this has just stuck. I hear Greek things like baklava, Athenia, and Lenny Kravitz a lot, and I have grown tired. They are just greeked out now, at least to my ears. Well, please excuse my babbling, but I must get on to describing this amazing find.
Hirmonoculos is a math that relies heavily on infinity concepts, irrational numbers, imaginary numbers, antivectors, probability, improbability, and infinite improbability, which is the math’s hallmark. It is very simple really. After a deep study of hypospace you discover these things called antivectors. Now, all people with basic physics knowledge can tell you what a vector is. Antivectors are not things that travel in the opposite direction. They are, in fact, very simple. Almost inexistent outside of hypospace, antivectors are phenomenal forces that occur as a result of the voids vectors randomly create. When two or more vectors run in parallel, or close enough to it, the space inside them is the antivector. Antivectors exert forces in a way that pushes objects in the opposite direction of the perpetrating vectors, but in a corkscrewlike motion. You see, when a thing is trapped in antivector voids, the object naturally is attracted to the vectors, but, as it gets farther away from one vector and speeds up, it desires to go to another farther away. That means that when two vectors form the antivector void, it will have sinusoidal motion, and most beyond that produce corkscrews. Fortytwo vectors seem odd in that the object will actually travel with a tangential motion, which is where the really amazing concepts enter.
Infinite Improbability is, as mentioned, the hallmark of Hirmonoculos. When fortytwo vectors create the antivector voids (now to be called the 42void) in hypospace, it moves in tangential ways, but it also has a slight turn to it that only very exact math can figure. Infinite Improbability allows for these calculations. Various settings can alter the way a 42void functions: things from light intensity, density, and even charge. Infinite Improbability looks at what common sense and extremely advanced physics would say and instantly tosses it all out. Everything left is improbable. Then, the element of fortytwo, which has a huge bearing on all Hirmonoculos, is set into that mix. After the improbable fortytwo element is inverted and then structured, by which I mean the elements of the situation are added, various amounts of algebra will be done and the answer found.
The advantage to this hypospace 42void of Infinite Improbability is that, when reversed, it can allow travel at Ludicrous Speed, which is about 7.44 times 10 raised to the power of fifteen kilometers per second. With this, we may get to places before we go. Only future research and the future can tell us what is possible. We shall become a people of the stars. Maybe.
