Stuck on Planet Zebes, Part 2
by

Firestorm Chamelion
Monday, August 15, 2005

Yo, I'm back. Now where was I? Oh, yeah! So the four of us were trapped on a strange planet with no obvious means of escape. We found an elevator just above the surface and took it down...

Ness: Woah, now where are we?
Paula: Like, look at all these plants! It's beautiful!
Jeff: How fascinating.
Poo: What is?
Jeff: The fact that all of these plants can grow here, with no rain or sunlight.
Ness: Hey, science guy, may I suggest we leave the little matters aside and start eorrying about bigger things? Like getting outta here?
Jeff: You're right. (The quartet walk around for about an hour. Soon, they reach a door with an eye on it.)
Ness: Man, this place is a freakin' maze! Where's that elevator? I'm going back up.
Jeff: Wait a second... Ness, look out! (The eye-door shoots a laser ring at Ness. He jumps away just in time. Jeff counters with a bazooka shot. The eye turns into a normal door and the four procede. In the next room, is the head of a gigantic lizard-like monster known as Kraid.)
Paula: Ewww! Gross! Kill it, Ness!
Ness: PSI Special beta! (Ness uses PSI special, but nothing happens.) There's no way! How are we supposed to defeat that?! Jeff, spy on that thing!
Jeff: Hmm... it's hide in inpenatrable. We have to look for a weak point! (Kraid's eyes swing open.)
Kraid: Heeg hegg heeg, so you are the tresspassers? Don't make Kraid laugh. Kraid eats insects like you for breakfasts and asks for seconds!
Paula: Hey! I'm no insect!
Kraid: Even so, Kraid cannot let you pass. Mother Brain's orders.
Jeff: His mouth! Aim for his mouth!
Kraid: Ho ho ho! So you think you can kill mighty Kraid? Well, Kraid asks little punks to bring it!
Jeff: Now! (Jeff fires a bazooka and Paula throws the super bomb.)
Kraid: ROOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR! (The room begins to shake.)
Ness: Did that do it? (Kraid stands up to reaveal his enormous 100 foot body.)
Poo: What the...?
Paula: It got bigger!
Ness: Now what are we supposed to do?
Kraid: Ha ha! Kraid hungry! (Picks up Paula)
Paula: Please don't eat me! (Jeff aims his bazooka.)
Ness: No! (Swats Jeff's hand.) You'll kill her, too!
Jeff: Then what do we do? (Suddenly, Kraid lets his hand and his guard down. From out of nowhere, several large missiles fly into Kraid's mouth. He drops Paula and sinks back into the ground. The group turns around and sees Samus Aran, galactic warrior standing before them.)
Ness: Thanks man, I thought we were finished.
Samus: Don't mention it.
Jeff: A woman?
Samus: Don't be sexist, punk! I am known as the greatest warrior in this galaxy. My name is Samus Aran.
Paula: Like wow! You must be a role model for girls everywhere.
Samus: That I am. But, you must tell me, what are you doing here? No human has set foot on Zebes for years.

So, we met galactic warrior Samus Aran and told her the whole story. Little did we know, we were about to embark on something much more important than returning home. Join me again next time for the next thrilling chapter in the Lost on Planet Zebes saga!.
 



 
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